She sat literally on the other side of the room, a good 15-20 feet away. It was her style. And at 85 years old, I wasn’t about to say something about it. But rest assured, she was about to say something to me.
I had just come off from an international ministry season and was back in my homeland. It had been rough. The leadership was wounding, my health was broken and my finances didn’t exist. I came to this place to rest and recuperate and I’m grateful for the Lord for sending me there.
But sometimes when you are beat down your mind doesn’t think clearly, you are just living in the swill of your hurts and heartaches. And I was there. Talking with her.
And there she was. Completely across the room.
I don’t remember what I was talking about. Obviously something along the lines of the rejection I had felt I had encountered, or perhaps the sense that God wasn’t doing anything about my situation, or how I was feeling alone in this world. I’m not sure. But then she spoke.
“Stop trying to prove a lie is true.”
There. She said it. And with a mere 8 words I was silenced.
I guess she didn’t need to be closer than 15 feet. Her aim still hit the mark.
It was true what she said.
My feelings were real. But what I felt wasn’t lining up with the truth. And instead of bringing my mind into line with the truth, my thoughts were trying to prove that what I was thinking was right. Perhaps so I could nurse my wounds and feel justified doing so.
It was true what she said. And my feelings were real. But what I felt wasn’t lining up with the truth. And instead of bringing my mind into line with the truth, my thoughts were trying to prove that what I was thinking was right. Perhaps so I could nurse my wounds and feel justified doing so.
That phrase has stuck with me. Regardless of what I feel and that I may feel justified in feeling that way, trying to justify that feeling as truth is pointless. I would do better to be spending my time proving God’s rightness:
That I’m loved.
That He cares for my situation.
That He listens and answers my every prayer.
That He has a purpose in my life beyond what I understand.
These things are true. I may feel like the “leftover of God” at times but this isn’t true. I am His. No more comparing myself or my situation to others. Just simple trust in the truth. And opening my eyes to see.
“Whatever is true…think on these things” Paul says.
Oftentimes our feelings, our situations, and our thoughts are not lining up with the truth. It can be a default reaction.
But like a police officer in pursuit of a fugitive, we must chase down and “take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ (2 Cor 10:5).
“Whatever is true.”
God is truth. The word “true” here has connotations of glory in it. Reverence. An attribute of God. Not an abstract concept but something embodied in God that is so frighteningly holy that evil cannot draw near.
Is my mind fixed on truth that comes from Him? Who he is? What He does? His rightness?
Let’s put away lies. Let’s not let our sorrows dictate our thoughts. Or our circumstances. These lead to anxiety, sadness, depression and stress.
But come, let us fix our eyes on truth. Our thoughts on truth. And our hearts on truth.
Whatever is true.
Think on these things.
